Finding Balance When the Holidays Arrive
Well, the holidays
are upon us, and I always relish this time of year. The pace slows, if only a
little, and I find myself with more moments to spend with family, reflect on
the year that was, and imagine the year that is coming. It is a season that
encourages gratitude and perspective, something that can be hard to maintain
during the other eleven months when deals stack up, deadlines tighten, and our
calendars appear to have a life of their own.
Looking back on my
career, especially those early decades when I was brokering full time while
also husbanding and parenting three amazing kids, I am often asked how I kept
any semblance of balance. Let me be clear. It was not easy. There were
sleepless nights, missed cues, and more than a few days when I felt stretched
too thin. But I made it through, and more importantly, I grew through it.
As you wrap gifts,
close year end transactions, or simply catch your breath, I want to offer three
lessons that helped me navigate the overlapping worlds of work and family.
These are not theories. These are practices that held me together.
1. Focus on what is important
In commercial real
estate, deals can feel monumental. They demand our attention, our creativity,
and often our weekends. But here is the truth I learned, sometimes the hard
way: Your family will not remember that deal you made. They will, however,
remember your absence from the dance recital, the league championship, or the
Scout outing.
Those moments do
not get replayed. You do not get a second chance at your child’s childhood. As
brokers, we pride ourselves on being present for our clients. Being present at
home, truly present, is what builds a life. Deals close and commissions fade. Memories
linger.
2. Spend your working time working
Over the years, I
have had the privilege of observing many top producers. They come in all styles
and personalities, but they share one trait. They have a laser like focus
during their most productive hours.
When it is time to
work, they work. They are not polishing paper clips, reorganizing desk drawers,
or scrolling their way into distraction. They use their productive hours with
intention. Because of that discipline, they earn the right to unplug without guilt.
That discipline
gave me margin. It allowed me to coach, to carpool, and to sit at the dinner
table without my phone buzzing like a brainstem. If you want balance, you
cannot waste the hours that are meant for production.
3. Keep perspective. We are brokers.
Let me say
something that may sound a little bold. We are brokers. We are not performing
heart surgery, saving souls, or sending astronauts into space.
What we do is
important. We help businesses grow, communities evolve, and owners invest in
their future. But what we do is not a matter of life and death. Once I accepted
that truth, an enormous weight lifted. The pressure I placed on myself did not
always match the stakes.
Keeping
perspective helped me show up at home as a calmer and steadier version of
myself. It allowed me to step away when needed, without the world collapsing or
without me imagining that it might.
As this year comes
to a close, I hope you find space to pause and consider how you balance the
roles you play as a broker, a spouse, a parent, a friend, and sometimes a
mentor. Our profession asks much of us. Our lives ask more.
The deals will
still be there in January. The people you love are here right now.
Take care of them.
Take care of yourself. And enjoy this season of slowing down.
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